I know. I know. You're putting off a photo shoot because:
you want to lose weight first. you want to get into shape first. there's no reason to have photos. you don't have the money. you don't have the time. why in the heck would you want a photo of just yourself? you'll get them of your kids but not you.
I know. I hear it all the time. Heck, I've said it myself.
This is why.
This is my friend, Jake. Actually, he's the father of my childhood friend, Jeff. I've known Jeff since elementary school, through high school and now he and his wife are still some of our dearest friends. You get the picture. This is one of those friends that has all the stories from little kid on up. I can't make him mad. hahaha
Anyhow, he has just the coolest dad. Always did. He had that dad that marched to his own beat. Did it his way. He caught rattle snakes, he shot guns, he laughed loudly and boldly, he rode motorcycles. One never really knew if he was more Army veteran, biker, snake wrangler, hippie or a pirate. You never knew because he was himself. He was all of those things. He was hilarious and mysterious and intriguing and you weren't ever around him without a memory being made.
Case in point.
My son, who is now 24, was at Jake's house with us one time. My son LOVES him some Jake, so he was there a lot. It was Labor Day weekend. We were all camping at Jake and his wife's place on the lake like we did EVERY labor day weekend.
That's when Jake taught my then young teenage son..... how to EAT A SCORPION.
You read that right. Braeden ate... ATE....
HE FREAKING ATE a scorpion.
When I say you were making memories. They went from singing around a campfire, to drinking too much, to playing with pet donkeys to...well, eating scorpions.
Memories and experiences were his super power.
And then... this year...
He passed away.
It was a jolt, and it sucked, and it made all those memories come flooding back.
You see, we hadn't camped with them in a few years. We hadn't SEEN them in a few years. To be honest, life got in the way and we hadn't even really TALKED in a few years.
And then, we couldn't.
But it did reconnect everyone. And the one thing I had? The one thing I could offer up?
The time that I had begged him to come into get some portraits done. I wanted to channel Richard Avedon and he was the perfect subject. He was such a good sport, and he and his super fun wife came to get photos done. Not his favorite thing, but he did it for me.
And then years later....I went to his funeral.
I didn't see the lighting or the lack of posing. That had been the intention, but what I saw was this powerful man staring straight at us. Saying, I might not be right with you now, but I'm here. I'm in all those memories and all those experiences and I DARE you to try and not see that I live on through that!
That's the why. Photos aren't for us. They are for a while...
They make us mentally healthier through smiling and laughing which releases serotonin. Then, they actually help our sense of belonging and confidence when we see ourselves and our loved ones on the walls of our home. (Ask my foster kids about this fact!) Then, they actually help our memories. Think of any childhood memory and I bet there's a snapshot attached to it. It's what helps the memory live.
But then? They're for your loved ones. Not just to have a photo at your funeral. But when Jake passed away, his wife told me that she'd taken prints from that shoot and has them framed and all over the room. Small prints. She felt lonely and needed him around. They ended up helping HER grieving process.
That's the thing
Get the photos. Exist in the photos. You don't need a reason other than to celebrate that YOU ARE ALIVE and you want to feel good while you're here....and help those that love you when you're not.
That's why it matters.
Me at that funeral looking into Jake's face, knowing we had a hell of a fun photo shoot... that's why what I do matters. To me, to you, to him, to them. It matters.
Have the photo shoot.
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